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First published May 16, 2008

THIS week, you'll have to do without my usual carefully constructed prose: I need to let off steam.

You see, some genius broke one of our car's wing mirrors the other night, pulling out the reflector and the moveable plate it fits into.

I can't just replace the glass bit, the whole things got to come off.

But I've got off lightly in a sense, because I've been able to order a new one over the internet for £25.

It looks pretty straightforward to fit so, apart from the hassle and annoyance, it's not the end of the world.

This latest takes the total number of times this has happened to at least six - and the cost beyond £100.

Number of times I've felt aggrieved enough to report it to police? Three, I think.

Number of people caught and prosecuted? That would be - can you guess? - yes, you're right: Zero.

OK, that was a bit of cheap shot.

Of course I don't expect scenes of crimes officers and search teams for a little bit of criminal damage.

For practical reasons it has to be a low priority and I understand that.

But it is frustrating for me and other car-owners when vandals get away with such mindless behaviour.

Clearly, a certain type of person gets satisfaction out of breaking bits off cars.

(Did I tell you about the phantom windscreen wiper torturer? Maybe another time.) But can I make a polite suggestion? If it's you, could you please do it to your own car next time?

Or if you haven't got a car, do it to your bike... or your PlayStation - indeed anything else that you actually own and have the right to do with what you wish.

You could even consider putting your wing mirror mangling days behind you and getting a job which uses the same sort of skills - stripping down cars that actually need stripping down, for instance.

7:52am Friday 16th May 2008

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