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IVF created my family. Now it's my business

Helping others - Tamsin with ten-month old Azaria and four-year-old twins Isabella and Francesca, who were conceived using IVF Helping others - Tamsin with ten-month old Azaria and four-year-old twins Isabella and Francesca, who were conceived using IVF

WHEN Tamsin Bowers and her husband Andrew went for fertility treatment they learnt that their reproductive systems just didn't get on.

" It was like they'd had an argument," says Tamsin about their first experience of IVF. "After being introduced in the petri dish, the eggs were stuck on one side and the sperm were on another."

After six years of trying for a baby they obviously had their suspicions something wasn't right. But when doctors couldn't find a reason for their problems conceiving, there was always that glimmer of hope that one month, if they kept trying for long enough, things would go their way.

It eventually got to the point where, with all other avenues explored, the couple, of Rectory Road, Hadleigh, were told that probably wouldn't happen and should try IVF treatment. The only problem was it could take another two years on the NHS.

After waiting so long already, the thought of putting their dreams on hold for another two years, and that was just to start treatment, was too painful to contemplate and they decided to seek help at a private clinic.

They didn't choose one in Essex or even London to carry out the procedure though. They went a little further from home.

Tamsin's brother lives in Sweden and knew someone who was going through the treatment over there. Through them Tamsin learnt that their success rate at the time was more than double that over here. 46 per cent compared to the 20 to 21 per cent on offer in England.

"Even with flights and accommodation it didn't work out any more expensive," says Tamsin on choosing to have treatment overseas. "We thought why pay for treatment over here, if it costs the same I might as well go to Sweden and double my chances."

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So the couple booked in to the recommended clinic in Falun and began IVF proceedings. With conventional treatment showing the eggs and sperm at a stand-off, the doctors tried a different method. This one, called ICSI (Intracytoplasmic sperm injection) where an individual sperm is injected into an egg, worked perfectly.

Tamsin says the reason the Swedish clinic has such high success rates, is largely down to the fact it uses a procedure called Blastocyst. This is where they monitor the development of the eggs over a period of five days, rather than the conventional two or three, which means they can choose only the healthiest eggs to re-implant.

Nine months later and Tamsin, 32 and Andrew, 40, were the proud parents of twins Isabella and Francesca, now four.

Life became a hectic round of dirty nappies, sleepless nights and all the other parental chores the couple had waited six long years for.

As well as finally gaining membership to the parenting club, the experience also opened up the doors to another social circle - those that had also struggled to conceive.

"Once you've had treatment yourself, all of a sudden you find out that actually lots of women have some sort of fertility problems," reveals Tamsin, who has since had another daughter Azaria, 10 months, by ICSI and plans to have one more baby using one of her eggs currently frozen at the clinic.

"There is still a stigma attached to saying you're having problems, but you'd be surprised by saying so, how many people will say god yeah we had problems, or my sister had problems or so and so had problems," she says.

It was this realisation, along with the discovery that not everyone had the stress-free experience she enjoyed, that made her set up business IVF Support Services (IVFSS).

I had such a positive experience," says Tamsin. "I finished my treatment feeling knowledgeable, fulfilled and optimistic.

"After my treatment and during my pregnancy I spoke to many women at ante-natal clinics and doctors surgeries who had found themselves in the same situation as me, undergoing fertility treatment, but, who were not as fortunate with their experiences."

With her first hand knowledge and contacts in Sweden, Tamsin now hopes to help other women going through the process.

Her website offers three different services: You can choose to have treatment with her consultants in Sweden; use her expertise to guide you through the vast choice of clinics and treatments available over here; or take advantage of the coaching service she offers.

"I know the lingo, I know pretty much every clinic within a 100 mile radius and I know what questions to ask," she says.

"People come to me who have booked in for counselling, only to be told sorry I don't know anything about IVF I can't help you. It's just another kick in the teeth for them," says Tamsin.

"I don't claim to be a professional, but I can speak to women from the point of view that I've been there myself.

I know how much pressure it puts on a relationship. I know that sex isn't enjoyable anymore, it has become a necessity," she says.

"When you first start trying for a baby it's exciting. Then all of a sudden the excitement is taken away and replaced by tests for sperm counts, oestrogen levels, temperature charts and ovulation sticks.

"It becomes a medical procedure and isn't fun anymore. By the time you get to the fertility clinic side of things you're pretty fed up, to put it mildly.

"The drugs they give you have their side effects, you get hot flushes and feel like your ovaries are going to burst. You've got all these pressures building up, but at the same time need to be positive to go through all the treatment. It's not an easy thing and my aim is to help lighten that load," says Tamsin, who used to work as a childcare teacher and youth mentor.

"I've always been passionate about my work, but I've never been as passionate about anything as I am about this," she says.

"I don't care if I'm up on the computer until two in the morning and the girls are up at six and if I can help someone just by giving them a bit of support on the telephone then I will do that. It's something I could talk about all day long. I find it very interesting and I work with fantastic people.

I feel I can help and there's no better feeling than being able to help someone else."

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