You're engaged....so what do you do next?

4:05pm Monday 18th February 2008

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HAVE you recently become the proud owner of a sparkling diamond ring?

Thanks to the excitement of Christmas, New Year and then last week's Valentines Day, It's been engagement season lately.

No sooner have you put the ring on your finger, then the wedding questions begin. When? where? what colour scheme are you going to have? can your third cousin twice removed be your bridesmaid?

Unless you've been planning your dream wedding since childhood, it can all be a little overwhelming.

To help prepare you for what lies ahead, we've spoken to a couple of industry insiders, plus one bride-to-be and one newlywed about the best way to get planning.

Kelly Spink of bridal store Wedding VIllage, Rayleigh, says organising a wedding can be a bit daunting but it doesn't need to be.

"My first advice would be to enjoy being engaged and don't panic," she says.

"When you're ready to start planning, the first thing you should do is to work out the guest list. Then you'll have the numbers ready for when you start looking at places to get married.

Once the venue is sorted then begin to think about the people who get booked up quickly, that you need to be there such as the DJ and photographer. Then it's time to consider themes and colours, then the wedding dress and finally all the bits and bobs. These little touches are the things that make a wedding but it's important to get the big things in place first before concentrating on the finer details."

Sandra Johnson of popular wedding venue Stockbrook Manor, Stock, says they are already taking bookings for 2010.

"For a good venue you are looking at an 18 month to two year wait," she says. "We've got no Friday or Saturday weddings available this year."

Because of the huge demand and also because of the huge costs of putting a wedding on nowadays, an increasing number of people are choosing to get married midweek.

"I always say to people that the most important people will be there whatever day it is," says Sandra.

Probably one of the most fun parts of planning a wedding is choosing the dress. According to Sandy Elvy of Cinderella Bridal, Basildon, you really need to be thinking about this a year in advance.

"Dresses can take anything from six to eight months to come in, she says. "There are some that you can get quicker than that but the chances are you're going to end up having to pay extra."

"At the moment any good bridal retailer will have in its spring 2008 collections."

Sandy recommends brides-to-be keep an open mind when it comes to choosing a dress.

"A lot of girls come in with an idea of exactly the type of dress they want, but often when they try on what they think they like it doesn't suit them. If you come in with an open mind then you've got the widest choice of dresses available to you," says Sandy, who also advises her customers to go away and think about the dress before committing to the purchase.

To help ease your wedding planning nerves further, we catch up with one bride-to and one newlywed to find out how they've coped with the pressure.

We want a big party

MAXINE Smith-Roberts plans her life around school holidays.

As the head of year seven at Shoebury High School, term times are pretty hectic. She started planning her wedding in the last summer holidays, spent last week's half term sorting out the finer details, will get married over the Easter weekend and then take her honeymoon in the next summer break.

With just over seven months to organise her wedding to partner of two years Andy Britten, Maxine could be forgiven for being at the seriously stressed stage by now.

But she says because this is second time round for both her and Andy, they know exactly what they want from their wedding and aren't getting caught up in the finer details.

"It's been really easy," says Maxine, who is getting married in a marquee at the Halfway House, Brentwood. "We know what we want this time and because we're paying for ourselves we can do exactly that.

We just really want to have a big party. It will be very informal, we're not having a top table and whoever wants to make a speech can."

"The only thing I'm worried about is the catering side of things," says Maxine, of Prittlewell. "Making sure my guests have a good time is the most important thing to me."

"I think because I'm not a first time bride, everything doesn't have to be perfect. My theme is tulips and if they start to wilt it's not the end of the world, if it rains it doesn't matter. I'm not expecting a celebrity wedding.

"My advice to anyone starting to plan their wedding is to have a good team of people around you that aren't going to cause problems. If anyone does then be firm from the start. It's your wedding. Also get a good group of girlfriends around you that are really into it and want to help."

Two years to plan our wedding

Shona Hughes and her husband Ed took their time to plan their wedding.

The pair, from Chafford Hundred, had a two year lead up to their wedding last September.

"Because the planning took place over such a long period it was absolutely fine. Initially the thought of planning a wedding was really daunting but because we had so long to arrange it, it didn't feel so stressful. I'd recommend doing it that way."

After getting engaged in 2005 the couple booked the Leez Priory for their 2007 wedding. The next thing they did was to secure the services of a photographer and videographer for the big day. By doing that so far in advance, Shona,25, says they saved several hundred pounds by getting it at that year's rates.

The rest of the details were then worked out over the course of the next two years.

Shona says financing the wedding was probably the most stressful part.

"We did think about getting married abroad to save money but there were so many of our friends and family that couldn't make it we decided against it," she says.

"We could have bought a house a whole year earlier if we hadn't got married, but it was all worth it and I'd do it all again.

"My advice to anyone who has just got engaged would be don't rush it. It's not worth the stress. You want to enjoy every minute of it, because it goes so quickly. I thought two years would take ages but before I knew it I was walking down the aisle."