Advanced psychotherapist and clinical hypnotherapist CLAIRE GASKIN sees clients in Essex and in London’s Harley Street. She is now bringing her expertise to the problems of our readers as our agony aunt. If you have a problem you’d like Claire’s advice with, email agonyaunt@nqe.com For more details on Claire’s work, visit benefittherapy.co.uk/

Dear Claire,

I find that I’m procrastinating a lot lately over things. I need to get motivated and start getting my life in order but need some advice on how to do this?

I’m so tired a lot of the time because I have a large family and work commitments so dreams and goals that I used to have just get put on hold a lot of the time. Is that normal? It is normal to just want to hibernate from life a lot of the time or to not have the energy to do something as simple as de-cluttering the kitchen? I think I don’t get enough vitamins but other than that I’m a healthy person. What do you recommend?

Claire says...

It’s completely normal to feel stuck when we don’t know where to start.

The first thing to do is arrange an appointment with your GP for a general check-up. You’ve been busy looking after everyone else but it’s essential to look after yourself, too.

You clearly have good organisational skills. It’s time to make them work in your favour. Write a list of what you want to achieve, and why. Be firm and ditch everything that isn’t important. Then, delegate as many tasks as you can, even to the youngest member of the family - this will give you time to attend to your own goals.

Try this ‘future pacing’ technique for achieving even the smallest of goals:

Visualise as vividly as you can, in your mind’s eye, exactly how it will look and feel when you have successfully achieved your goal. Add in a soundtrack of what you can hear, to anchor the scene in your mind. Rehearse this mental movie several times before you begin.

Get into the habit every morning of creating a mental movie that starts: “It’s the end of the day and I feel great because…’.

 A tired brain just wants to switch off so make sure you get plenty of rest. Something simple like a long soak in the bath, or an early night with a good book, will be really beneficial. Tell everyone this is ‘me’ time and switch off your phone, iPad and laptop - being available 24/7 just adds unnecessary stress.